Love Interests

4th grade was a busy time for me in the romance department. I fell in love with a cute-as-all-getout girl named Rhonda (cue the Beach Boys singing “Help Me, Rhonda”). This happened within the space of an hour (I think it was during math lesson). She, apparently, fell in love with me, too, for reasons that befuddle me to this day – there were boys in our class much better looking and much more popular than I. Perhaps my wallflower-like persona was attractive to her. Who knows, except perhaps Rhonda, and I’ll bet she doesn’t remember if I asked her now. I remember Rhonda brought her older sister to the classroom and pointed to me (i.e. “this is the boyfriend”). Her sister didn’t seem to have any particular reaction, so I have no idea if I passed muster or not. The whirlwind affair lasted a week, I think, before she discovered she really didn’t love me. Or particularly like me, for that matter. Broke my heart. I probably got over it in a week or so. Except for a brief stint at a dance in 7th grade, we had nothing to do with each other since that time, though she remained my crush and fantasy all the way through high school.

Actually, now that I think about it, I did ask her why she was attracted to me, and she said it was because I wasn’t mushy. I, thinking mushy was something like vegetables cooked way too long, sought clarification, and she explained that I wasn’t annoyingly romantic, which turns out I was, which is probably why she tired of me so quickly.

Linda was another crush – she had a darker complexion and was (and presumably still is) of some exotic descent (Mediterranean, Middle Eastern, or something). Exotic in my mind, anyway. She was a bit more tomboyish than Rhonda, which I found very attractive for some reason, but she never fell in love with me, or fell in anything with me.